STOCK PILING SONG

My husband was sent this by a  friend in his U3A guitar group

This may amuse you


The tune is "I will survive"

A song about “stockpilers”. (Think Gloria Gaynor)

I was afraid, I was petrified, There was no loo roll down at Aldi and I nearly cried. 

Oh! I spent oh so many nights just thinking how you did me wrong,

I used to wipe, And now I’m forced to just drip dry! 

No anti-bac! No bloody soap and if you think you’re buying pasta well you’ve got no hope! 

I would have bought that box of eggs, I would have rationed out my bread,

If I’d have known for just one second everyone would lose their head!

Go on now go, walk out the door! You bloody stockpilers, You are not welcome anymore! 

Weren’t you ones who just bought all the sodding beans, You selfish gits! 

I hope you spill them down your jeans. 

Oh no not I, I won’t panic buy! Oh as long as I have alcohol, I know I’ll stay alive, 

Though I can’t buy my usual cheese this will not bring me to my knees 

And I’ll survive, I will survive, hey, hey! 

It took all the strength I had not to not to fall apart, There was just apples and 1 carrot in my shopping cart, 

And I spent hours walking round just feeling sorry for myself, The empty store, with boxes strewn across the floor 

And you’ll see me, somebody who, Cannot buy anything she came for, and it’s down to you And frickin Reg from down the road is such a selfish blimmin git

Because he stockpiled all the loo roll so nobody else can s@*t! 

Go on now go, walk out the door! You bloody stockpilers, 

You are not welcome anymore! 

Weren’t you ones who just bought all the sodding cakes 

Can’t you make a crumble, Do you people not know how to bake? 

Oh no not I, I won’t panic buy! Oh as long as I have alcohol, I know I’ll stay alive, 

Though I can’t buy my usual cheese, this will not bring me to my knees 

And I’ll survive, I will survive! Yeah Yeah